Don't Fuck With my Psycho Southern Grandma

Nobody had any right making this weeks feature film review. I had to sneak in to Art's House Theatre to see this horror. Thrown out time after time, I seem to recall the plot out of sequence, a cast of unlikely stars and the inside of a Campus Public Safety Ford LTD.

"Crash, bang, bam" my aching bones protested each blow, but Jessica Tandy renders a bewildering portrayal of a kind, Southern belle gone completely insane with the ravages of time and cast-iron plates.

"In the final scene in 'Driving Miss Daisy' ", Ms. Tandy begins, "I performed her first flight of dementia ranting about having to 'grade the childrens' papers' " and it seemed so fun to play a kind godly woman gone all stupid. To play a retard like this lunatic crone is an orgasm at my age!"

"And keep your ass out of Art's" a beefy UNV linebacker taunted as I dashed for the entrance.

James Earl Jones' opening scene in "Psycho Grandma" is as timelessly dignified as his rich Nigerian Baratone as he plays Mgmbe Opso, the insurgent coup leader hinding out in the Grandmother's tea room. In one scene, he uses a flamethrower to save a fine Hummel collection.